Mrs Know-It-All

“If you want to appear intelligent speak only about things you know about “

-Unknown

“If you speak only about things you know about, you will appear intelligent”

-Zansi

You just think you know everything. You just think you know it all. Dr S voice rings in my head. This is my dear friend’s conclusion every time we get into an argument. It used to irk me till I saw it for what it was. A cheap shot at my soft spot. I wish I could tell her that no I do not know it all. Certainly not. Definitely not. I know this for sure because parenting floored me. flat. I know absolutely nothing about being a parent because nobody tells you how much hard work it is. Parenting is a lot of Hard work. A lot of brain work, decision making and balancing.

I learnt how to swim at a really young age. I was probably 5 years old or younger. Saturday mornings, my sister and I would head over to a family friend’s swimming pool for lessons. So you can imagine my excitement when my son, The Prince clocked 4 years old. It was time for swimming lessons. We had already introduced him to the pool at a very young age and he loved splashing in the water. Day one of swimming lessons went without much drama however by the next swimming lesson drama started. It was scream-fest cry-fest and negotiation-fest. I was in shock. Where did I go wrong? This boy loves the pool. Do I stop now or continue with this torture? It didn’t help that hubby was on his side. Leave the boy jare. Even the stares from other parents at the pool was saying the same thing.

One day while blog crawling researching (*winks), I stumbled on Afam’s post on swimming and safety (read here: Dip, Dive, Coast!) and I had a rethink. This swimming skill is very important to me however The Prince and I’s relationship was also on the line. For days the issue kept nagging me. So one day I got home,called The Prince aside and negotiated with him. It was easier than I expected. He said he would do the lessons if I coached. Even though I can swim, I honestly cannot remember how I learnt but I accepted the challenge started reading up and watching videos.We had our first lesson 2 weeks ago. I want to imagine myself like the swimming coach version of Richard Williams ( Serena Williams’ Dad)… (*laughs).

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My Prince doing his thing

So nope…. I do not know it all. But I’m curious and very teachable. So right now my prince and I are learning how to swim… together.

Love

Zansi

Twitter: @zansisgroove

Website: http://www.zansisgroove.wordpress.com

Email: zansisgroove@gmail.com

A Few Good Men

Last week I was in traffic along Wempco road in Ogba. The road is presently under construction mixed with the rains and rush hour traffic it is a simple recipe for accidents. A bit of a distance away a lady’s car had been ‘brushed by a tricycle aka Keke maruwa. This had caused a slight build up at this point. In the yellow bus next to me 3 men started expressing their opinion about the situation very loudly. It was obvious they wanted me to hear and possibly comment. I almost did but I remembered….

“I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.”
-George Bernard Shaw

Their comments ranged from women are so stupid to women are wicked, stubborn and evil. As some point the lady grabbed the keke maruwa driver’s shirt. The 3 men increased their tempo. Women are evil creatures, that’s why women cannot rule this country, that’s why women should not drive on highways (yes they said that!). They kept going on and on. 

If I had a chance I would have simply replied… There are good people and there are bad people in this world. There are good men and there are bad men just as there are good women and there are bad women. That is just the way it is because obviously their venom was not actually directed at the lady ahead but at women in general.

A yoruba adage says “Eniyan buruku ti ba eniyan rere je”. Translation: “Bad people have given good people a bad image” * winks, 

Situations like this bring to mind the need to appreciate the good that people do. The need to say from time to time, hey I think you are amazing. I think you are doing a good job or simply something you did or said inspired me. I don’t do this as often as I wish to so I was inspired by Father’s Day to appreciate a few good men. Not my husband or father as is usually expected but men I worked with for a particular period. These men never discriminated me, always encouraged me, criticized me when need and definitely applauded me. I was a star because of them. So drumroll please….. 

Mr Henry: Words are not enough to describe how awesome I think you are.You showed me the true definition of a leader. You put it all on the line. 

Mr Owo: When I think of you I think of patience, thoroughness and generosity. You always believed in me. 

Kfagbs: You made coming to work about learning and then you turned it around and made learning fun!!

Mr Emmanuel: Working with you initially was rough but now I know that you put the pressure on to bring out the best and no matter how hard you pushed me at the end of it you’d take out the time to make me understand your reasons. I was your sub and you didn’t need to explain to me but you did. That’s respect. 

Wow! 

 

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Read more about the need and importance of appreciation here.

Love 

Zansi 

Twitter: @zansisgroove

Website: http://www.zansisgroove.wordpress.com

Email: zansisgroove@gmail.com